Operation Golden Shower

I've been busy.

My newest obsession has elicited words from my Mother such as unacceptable, disgusting, disconcerting & (my personal favorite) WTF?!?

The only word I don't understand why she keeps using is "WHY?"  (More on this later...)

Discovering the convenience and versatility of my favorite boy pee-stick has been nothing short of my most educational and entertaining escapade yet.
Not sure if you are aware, but boys can relieve themselves anywhere.  Now, when I say anywhere, I mean ANYWHERE, ANYTIME, ANYHOW.

I don't try to hide it, but I do enjoy the challenge of completing the task in record time.
My routine consists of the following:
1) Look innocent & occupied.
2) Wait for the opportune time (ideally it's when my Mom is distracted with a task).
3) Pull my elastic wasted pants down to my knees & let it fly!
4) Laugh maniacally & try to finish before my Mom can reach me.

I am not picky about where I go, although I have learned that trying to pull off this maneuver outside has proven to be a poorly thought out plan.  My last attempt landed me face down (and pants down) in the snow & that shock of coldness on the boy-parts can stun even a trained professional, like myself, to a screeching halt.

I have successfully managed to execute the plan I like to refer to as "Operation Golden Shower" in the following places:
the heat vent, the toy box, my car seat, on my sister at the dinner table, the pantry, the pots & pans cupboard, the dryer, the garbage can, anywhere on the floor, my sister's Barbie house, and the sink.  The list is really endless; as I'm sure my Mom has yet to find a few of my sneakier hidden locations.

My Mom is at a loss.
I've heard her say, "it's like we've adopted a puppy!"
She has resorted to pants with buttons (as I have yet to master the dexterity required to undo said buttons) & overalls.  Have no fear; I can pull them down just far enough to do what I need to do.

Now back to the "Why?"...
Really?  You have to ask?
I could give you the clinical answer, and say "I am the third-born, a 2 year old boy, that is vying for the attention of anyone who will give it to me, and attention is attention, positive or negative.  In addition, it is developmentally appropriate for me to experiment with my body, how it works, and use it to manipulate control, as I am not afforded much being only 2."

Or I could say WHY NOT?!?  It's hilarious!
Look at it this way, at least I'm not biting people anymore.
And this too shall pass...until the next phase!