WWE Future Champ

I've finally taken down the biggest with my patented WWE move "Big-But-Clutch".  Now onto the old man who brings home the bacon.  I'll be runnin' this place by mornin' IF YOU SMELL, WHAT "THE B" HAS COOKIN!

Teeth

My 6 year old sister lost a tooth today.  WHAT?!? Your teeth fall out?  What kind of cruel joke is that?  How am I supposed to defend myself?  I will have to look further into this situation...

Hide-&-Go-Seek

I found the best hiding place EVER.  It took my mom 23 minutes to find me.  I could hear her the whole time yelling my name, but don't worry, I didn't say a word.  I got board after a while (23 minutes is a long time to hide in a dryer) and started counting, and that's when she found me.  Her only request was that next time I mention to her that we are playing Hide-&-Go-Seek BEFORE I hide.  Details.

The Cure For Hangovers

Guess who doesn't care if my Mom & Dad stayed out way too late and want to sleep their brain ache off?  THIS GUY!  So I poked them both in the face with my tooth brush until they got out of bed.  I've got things to do & trouble to brew...

Meeting A New Friend

I met a new friend, and possibly a partner in crime (the background checks are still taking place) at the neighborhood park today.  Carson watched as I showed him how to flip head first through he monkey bars.  He was a little reluctant at first, but eventually came around to trying it (your welcome to his Mom).  I taught him it was A-OK to lick all things funny to me (but disgusting to my Mom) like the swing seat, a large rock & an ant.  He thinks I'm pretty cool, although his Mom may need a little more convincing.  Don't worry, I have a way of winning over the ladies.

Basic Human Anatomy

Technically, I didn't LIE when my mom asked if I peed on the door & I said "No". Being the honest gent that I am, however, I did have to come clean and fess up (as well as give her a lesson in basic human anatomy) when I told her that "my penis did".  I'm sure this is the first of many instances where my favorite boy part will either be the cause or the excuse for the trouble I'm in.
PS- Mom, the only "lesson" I learned from cleaning the door is that I like the taste of cleaner.  How ya like them apples?