Trapped

I told my sister, "be dog in cage.".  The convincing was too easy, so I thought I would prolong the fun & sit my 33 lb body on top of the basket, rendering her trapped & unable to escape.  Super-Genius Brennan has outsmarted the 6  year old AGAIN! Score: Brennan=3, Riley=0.
Don't trust the innocent smile, I know exactly what I'm doing.

Naked Flash

When my mom came in to get me from my nap, I greeted her with a big smile & NOTHING else. I am now obsessed with being naked & lovin' it! As soon as she turns her head, it's off with the pants.  No matter where I am or what I'm doing, I always have time for a little naked flash around the house.
If she tries to make me descent again, I sit on the floor straight-legged, shove my undies between my thighs & clench. I wonder what else I can hide from her in there?
More tomorrow...

Roller Coaster

What do you get when you combine a laundry basket & stairs?  A homemade roller coaster , OF COURSE!  It wasn't until after scooting to the edge & launching that I considered breaks.  Don't worry, the front door halted all forward motion & I made sure to pad myself with my blanket and favorite stuffed animal, Fluff.  I am looking further into "Inventors-R-Us" for the development of basket air-breaks.  Maybe I'll get my sisters in on this idea, they are always full of great suggestions & willing to use me as a test dummy.

Rug Burn

I learned a very important lesson today...
Whey trying to escape from your mom after your bath, via sliding down the stairs feet-first on your belly at an extremely high speed, it is VERY IMPORTANT to remember underwear!  Rug burn is not fun.  It's especially unpleasant when it's under my Mickey Mouse undies.
Next time...turn over.

Women: Lesson 2

"Everything I need to know about women, I learned from THE B!"
Lesson 2:
While chillin' with my "neighborhood hottie", I turned my back on her for one second & BAM!  A chilly reminder as to why you never turn your back on a woman...especially if that lady has seen the pics you posted with your "out-of-neighborhood hottie."  Lesson learned.

Women: Lesson 1

I'm thinking of branching out to other blogs... coming soon:
"Everything I need to know about women, I learned from THE B!"
Lesson 1:
Show up unannounced at your lady's house on her birthday with flowers and a balloon.  When she answers (& all of her relatives HAPPEN to be there with her) give her the gifts, a kiss & then turn to leave.  After your mom straps you in your car seat, patiently wait 25 years until she's of-age to marry you.  In the mean time, add more shenanigans to The B-Blogs.
Hopefully she has forgiven (and forgotten) the minor infraction of biting her face (twice) you are guilty of...even if your shirt gives you away.

The Blender

Guess what happens when you reach your arm around your Mom really stealth-like to turn on a blender that has a metal spoon in it (while your Mom is standing right next to it, snapping the cup lid on the smoothie she just poured)?
After the shards of plastic stop flying, the glass pitcher has landed (in one piece, remarkably) & the smoothie has COVERED the room...your Mom starts to cry.  Then she starts talking about drinking...the smoothie all over her face must have made her thirsty.